confused, would like some help

confused, would like some help

i have been wondering on and off if am trans. i'm a firm believer that you need dysphoria, but i'm just unsure if what i am feeling is that. i've read experiences of trans people and identified with several issues, but i am afraid i'm just confused. i don't want to start asking everyone to use a different name and pronouns with me, but at the same time i think that would help me better understand what it is i'm feeling? i am biologically female, and i've been questioning this with ranging intensity for about 2 years. recently i've been thinking about it a lot more again as i noticed things i felt uncomfortable with that my friends found weird when i brought up. a big example of this is that during my period, i feel insanely uncomfortable with my body and breasts. not in the way of normal cramps, but a really intense feeling of discomfort in my body and wanting to rip myself out of my skin. some other smaller things that i know aren't individually telling, but altogether are adding to me questioning are that i wear primarily baggy or oversized clothes, i tend to relate more to my male friends, and i generally notice that i dissociate my face from my body. i'm bisexual, and i generally like how my body looks, but (for a lack of a better way to put this) from a 2nd person view. it doesn't feel like mine, it's like appreciating someone else's figure and dissociating it from my own. when i focus on thinking of my body as mine, i often wish i had a flat chest. when i take into consideration some of the procedures of transition , i would like top surgery and for my voice to be deeper . any help figuring this out would be greatly appreciated

Re: confused, would like some help

it just sounds like general discomfort with your body, honestly. dysphoria is the disconnect from your gender (mind) and sex (body). unless you feel like your body is not your own because you know it's meant to match the opposite sex, i think that would be the time to actually consider identifying as trans.

your discomfort during your period is normal and feeling like you relate more to guys is normal as well (my sister doesn't have very many girl friends bc they cause her more trouble n drama at school than guy friends do). dissociating your face from your body is normal too; a lot of people tend to do that. having a baggier clothing style doesn't really lead to anything unless you're actively thinking about how it's going to make you look more boy-ish.

so think about it for a second:
besides top surgery and a deeper voice, are you comfortable with any of the other changes that come with testosterone? ie more facial/body hair, rougher skin, smaller chest, less curves (fat distribution part), etc etc
do you think you'll be happier being referred to as a male? name, pronouns, even just how people act around/towards you?

 

It's his Dema Dick.

Re: confused, would like some help

thank you for responding! for the first part, i agree, i haven't gone out and asked anyone to use different pronouns or anything as i'm uncertain on if all still.
with the baggy clothes, i do feel pretty happy when they hide the fact my figure is female, i like that they make me look more male.
as for t, i have thought about this one a lot and i do think i'd be comfortable, it's just that the thought of going through the whole process is intimidating. i have definitely noticed that i feel good when i'm treated like a guy, though like i said i know these things individually don't necessarily mean i am trans. i figure this experience varies and i don't know exactly how i would know for sure that that is what i'm experiencing. i hope this come off as argumentative or anything as i know it's hard to tell online sometimes, i'm very grateful for a response at all.
i don't quite know how to work this website so i hope this reply goes through lol